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"There you are, Mrs. King. How do you like it?" The burly hairdresser stepped back a bit and waited expectantly for a reaction to his latest masterpiece.
Amanda stared at her reflection in the mirror and tried her best to plaster on a pleased expression. She wasn't sure if she could pull it off.
"It's wonderful," she gushed with as much enthusiasm as she could muster.
"I'm so glad you're happy," Mr. Emelio exuded. "A change is always nice. I've been after your mother to get you in here for so long."
As he prattled on, Amanda took a moment to scrutinize the woman who stared at her from the glass. The face was the same, but somehow, with this new hairstyle, she appeared older... more motherly, for lack of a better word. She'd always worn her hair down, mostly at shoulder length. There had been changes, certainly, but nothing like this. This short, teased style made her feel so different. But then, wasn't that why she'd come in and had it done?
She got up from the chair and walked to the cashier. Emelio followed, making a big deal over her to the girl taking her money. Amanda only half heard his comments, going about paying the bill mechanically, her thoughts a million miles away. Soon she was out the door of the salon, and into the bright morning sun.
She spotted her station wagon parked a few spaces away, but was in no hurry to go home. Instead, she headed in the opposite direction, strolling slowly along the row of small shops. She stopped at several of them, gazing not so much at the merchandise displayed in the windows, but rather at her own reflection. It was like looking at a stranger and she couldn't keep from raising her hand to feel the puffy coiffure.
She didn't like it, but there wasn't much she could do about it now. At least it was only hair and would grow out in time. That was some consolation, but Amanda was more concerned right now with her motives for having it done like this in the first place.
She'd had a birthday last week, but thirty-three wasn't supposed to be one of those difficult ages. It was just kind of there -- in between the much rougher thirty and forty. So it couldn't have been an age thing. That kind of stuff didn't really bother her much anyway.
She was long past any emotional leftovers of her divorce from Joe. Life had simply gone on. Joe had barely spent much time with them anyway the last few years so her little family hadn't really been affected much by the legal dissolution of what was left of her marriage. No, she was positive this didn't have anything to do with her ex-husband. So what was going on in her life that might have caused her to act so impulsively -- and drastically?
That question wasn't very hard to answer. As much as she tried to tell herself otherwise, there was only one person who could have sent her into the emotional turmoil that had vented itself in her dramatic change in appearance -- Lee Stetson.
Even thinking his name sent tiny shivers down her spine -- those same feelings that panicked her every time they happened. She couldn't let what she felt for her partner come much closer to the surface than she already had. She refused to allow herself to be hurt, and that's what would happen if Lee even suspected how much Amanda was attracted to him.
There was no way a man like Lee could ever return her feelings. At best he would give her the equivalent of an understanding pat on the head and request another partner. At worst, he would laugh at the very idea that they could ever...
Amanda gave herself a mental shake. There was no romantic future with Lee. There couldn't be. She wasn't at all the type of woman Lee ever dated, let alone had a serious relationship with. She paused in her thinking again. Actually, she'd never seen Lee in a serious relationship, though she knew he'd had at least one -- with Eva -- and that had ended so badly. No, Lee was not a one-woman, settling down type of man, and definitely not remotely interested in Amanda King, single mom and -- as Francine constantly reminded her -- housewife.
But there had been San Angelo. Amanda closed her eyes briefly and instantly her mind conjured up that wonderful image of Lee standing there in his tux, holding her hand, repeating the marriage vows -- all the while his intense blue eyes holding her gaze. It took all the control she had for Amanda to keep from sighing at the memory. A little more than a month had gone by since that assignment, but she still replayed that scenario over and over again in her mind. It was imprinted into her memory for all time -- the way Lee had looked at her, the feel of his lips as he kissed her, even the timber of his voice as he said the words promising to take her as his wife.
It was all a sham, of course -- part of their cover. The names were wrong and the papers faked. There had never been a question of it being real. The fact that Lee managed to convey so much emotion into his voice and eyes... well, that was only a tribute to what a great agent Scarecrow was. He'd convinced everyone present he was marrying the woman he loved, and in the process had caused Amanda to fall head over heels in love with him.
This time she did sigh. She wasn't moonstruck. The bogus wedding couldn't have triggered such a strong reaction if she hadn't already been well on her way to being hopelessly smitten. It was just that since San Angelo she'd been unable to lie to herself anymore. No longer could she dismiss what was going on in her heart, and she knew unless she could put some distance between those emotions and Lee, working with him would be nearly impossible.
Once more she glanced at her reflection. This hairdo was as much for her benefit as it was for Lee's. Not only would it help keep him from thinking of her as more than just an occasional partner and sometime pain in the neck homemaker, it would help Amanda think of herself as just that. Now, when those flights of fancy threatened to take command, all she had to do was look in the mirror and she would be reminded just how ludicrous she was being.
She lifted her shoulders with new resolve. She'd go into work on Monday and pretend that the whole business in the Caribbean was forgotten -- filed away with the closed case. She and Lee could still work together and still be friends. She would be satisfied with that.
Lee Stetson sat at his desk, chewing on his lower lip, tapping the letter he'd just received absently against his thigh. He was lost in thought, barely registering the movement of the other agents and Agency personnel around him. It wasn't often that he found himself totally perplexed, but thanks to Aunt Katie he was completely at a loss.
He glanced at the seemingly inoffensive note he'd found in his mailbox on Saturday, his aunt's neat handwriting clearly identifiable. When he'd opened it curiously he was caught completely off guard by the dilemma it presented him.
It was innocent enough. His aunt had merely inquired whether or not he planned to attend the reunion again this year. That in itself was not a big deal. Upon returning for the gathering last year after so long an absence, he'd realized he really missed his family. He hadn't given it much thought, but if his schedule allowed, certainly he'd go again.
It was Katie's following comment that had thrown him. She wanted to be sure he knew he was welcome to bring Amanda and the boys with him. A simple statement, but Lee could picture the gleam in his aunt's twinkling blue eyes, the hidden smile as she asked about his plans. It was as vivid to him as if she were standing here in front of him. Katie was playing matchmaker and Lee wasn't sure what to do about it.
Certainly Amanda had every right to go to New Mexico. He knew she'd made fast friends with his many cousins and aunts and uncles. If they wanted her at the reunion it wasn't his place to keep her away -- not that he even wanted to. If he was completely honest with himself, he had to admit that having Amanda at the ranch was a big part of why he'd found it so enjoyable. He wouldn't mind at all if she was there this year. The difficult part was how to go about broaching the subject.
He rubbed at his eyes wearily. He'd been thinking about this all weekend and he still hadn't come up with a way to invite Amanda to Glorieta without making it sound like an invitation. He knew it was silly. If they were both going, it only made sense to make plans to go together. But he shuddered at the picture that presented. He, Amanda, Phillip and Jamie all traveling together and worse, arriving together -- like a perfect little family. He could just imagine the thrill he'd give his aunts by doing that.
Of course, going separately would be even worse. How stupid and immature he would look and sound by insisting on taking different flights... or the same flight, but having different seats. It all smacked of junior high somehow and he could hear a younger version of himself insisting to Aunt Katie that Amanda King was not his girlfriend.
He heaved a great sigh. There was, of course, that issue. What exactly was Amanda to him? His friend -- certainly, though a year ago he would have denied it. His partner -- definitely, yet again, even a few months ago he wouldn't have accepted that. So when did the pretty stranger he'd approached on the train platform to help him out of a jam become such an integral part of his life that he was wracking his brain to figure out a way to go to Glorieta with her without putting either of them in an uncomfortable situation?
And then there was San Angelo. He'd tried frantically for the last month not to dwell on what had occurred there. But the memory was always ready to surface given the least little chance. He recalled to the exact detail how beautiful Amanda had looked in that formal white wedding gown, the cloud of flowers and lace framing her delicate face. And her eyes -- those expressive brown eyes. In their depths he could see a mix of uncertainty about the whole situation, yet there was also trust -- trust in him to see them through and get them out of their predicament.
There had also been something else -- something he couldn't name, but whatever it was, he hadn't been able to tear his gaze away as he mouthed the words the minister told him. Then they'd kissed. They'd had to, of course, to keep their cover intact, but he could still feel her lips as they brushed his own in that first tentative touch. Then, for some reason he couldn't explain, he'd done it a second time, as if once wasn't enough to satisfy him. When they pulled apart, for a brief moment they stood face to face, the feeling electric between them. Lee still couldn't be sure if given the chance, he wouldn't have leaned forward for yet another taste of her lips, but duty had called and the moment passed.
In the confusion of wrapping up the case he'd let the incident slip from his mind, but after coming home the memory of it haunted him. He tried not to think about it. He didn't want to think about it. It couldn't possibly be what he thought it was. It was too ridiculous to even consider. Amanda wasn't ... in love with him, and he certainly wasn't in love with her. He wasn't. She was attractive of course, but even in his wildest imaginings he couldn't see the two of them...
He mentally shook himself out of that little reverie. It was a dangerous path. Even if he let himself think about it, there was no way Amanda would even consider becoming involved with the likes of him. She needed somebody stable and down to earth -- like Don ... no Dean, that was the guy's name. Damn, why can't I ever remember it? Probably because Amanda hadn't talked about him in a long time and Lee just figured he wasn't a part of her life anymore. It didn't matter anyway. It all came down to the fact that the last thing Amanda King was looking for was a fast fling and that was all Lee was capable of giving a woman.
Which brought him back to his original quandary. How was he going to bring up the subject of going to the reunion to Amanda without making it sound like he didn't want her to come. Or worse, making it seem like it was a couple kind of thing.
"Ya outta try sleeping at night, Scarecrow."
Lee glanced up, startled by Billy's voice. His boss was standing in front of the desk, a thick file in his hand. Lee grimaced at the remark.
"Very funny, Billy. I'll have you know I was alone last night... very alone."
"Losing your touch?" Billy chuckled at Lee's glare, then held up the folder. "I need to see you. Is Mrs. King in?"
"Haven't seen her yet." Lee wondered if he'd managed to keep from flushing bright red at the mention of Amanda. He wasn't sure, especially when Billy gave him an inscrutable look.
"As soon as she reports in, I need both of you in my office."
Lee nodded and watched Billy disappear behind the door, wondering what new assignment might be in the works. He glanced at his watch. Amanda was usually pretty prompt. She should have been here ten minutes ago. He picked up the phone and punched in the number, vaguely registering that he knew it by heart and not sure why that was disconcerting. He pushed such distracting thoughts aside for the moment when Amanda's mother answered the phone.
"Mrs. West? Uh... I was just wondering if Amanda was still at home."
It took only a few moments to ascertain that Amanda had left at her regular time, but it was nearly five minutes before he could convince Dotty there was no need to worry, that he'd probably just missed her daughter and yes, he would be sure and have Amanda call home and let her mother know everything was all right.
He finally hung up and punched in the number for the main street entrance.
"Mrs. Marsten? Yeah, I was just wondering if Mrs. King had come in yet?'
"Why yes, she came through half an hour ago... she even got the password right on the first try. Is there a problem?"
"No," Lee assured her. "No problem. Thanks."
He hung up and wondered how he could have missed seeing Amanda. Had she even come into the bullpen yet? Where might she have gone? He got up and made his way out the double glass doors, ready to make a room by room search if he had to. As soon as he entered the spacious hallway he spotted Francine and flagged her down.
"What's wrong, Lee?"
By her concerned expression, Lee knew he must appear flustered and he did his best to calm down. Rumors flew fast and furious through the Agency's various departments and the last thing he needed was somebody spreading tales about his relationship with Amanda -- especially when there wasn't one.
"Nothing's wrong," he assured the blond agent. "I was just wondering if you've seen Amanda this morning."
"Sure," Francine informed him matter-of-factly, then regarded him curiously. "I can't see how you didn't. She must've walked past your desk a half dozen times." She gave an exaggerated sigh. "Poor dear. Somebody should clue her in on how not to try so hard. Suburban vamp is wasted on you."
Lee grit his teeth and refrained from commenting. He knew Francine was merely goading him and that she didn't really think there was anything going on. If he ever let her see his true reactions to her constant barbs toward Amanda, there'd be no living with her.
"Do you know where she is now?" he pressed.
Francine thought a moment. "I think she was on her way to Crypto with some transcriptions."
"Thank you, Francine," Lee intoned sweetly and started off in that direction.
He really must've been in the ozone not to have even noticed Amanda in the bullpen. He hoped she hadn't tried to get his attention. Now he was in the awkward position of explaining to his partner why she had to call her mother and assure the poor woman that her daughter hadn't been kidnaped by terrorists or worse.
He walked into Crypto and stood at the door, letting his eyes rove across the many desks and cubicles. The place was misleadingly quiet. A lot of great work went on here, but it was mostly done on computers and in the minds of those who operated them. The only sound was the muted clack of several keyboards and his attention moved to the row of terminals. That was the most likely place for Amanda to be.
He was disappointed. There were only two women working there. One was Corkie Winsor, a young recruit with the looks of Brooke Shields and the brain of Einstein. He didn't know the other woman. She had her back to him, but her short, old-lady style hairdo told him it definitely wasn't Amanda.
"Hey, Scarecrow."
Lee turned to greet the section head. "How ya doing, Evan?"
The older man shrugged his shoulders. "Can't complain. Whatcha need? I wasn't informed of anything."
"Relax," Lee assured the man with a smile. "I'm not here on a case. I'm trying to find Amanda King. Have you seen her?"
Evan gave him a funny look and raised an eyebrow. "Well... sure, Lee. She's right over there." He pointed back at the terminals.
Lee followed his gesture to the two women he'd seen before. He repressed an exasperated sigh. "Don't be dumb, Evan. Don't you think I'd know Amanda if I saw her. That's not..."
Lee's words stopped abruptly as the woman turned. It was most assuredly Amanda King.
"Whatever you say, Scarecrow," Evan quipped with a chuckle and returned to his desk.
Lee ignored him. He was too intent on studying his partner and the drastic change in her appearance. He was consciously aware of clamping his jaw shut and he hoped he hadn't stood there gaping for very long. Amanda looked so... so... he couldn't really pin it down, but she definitely looked very un-Amanda.
By this time she'd seen him standing there and she got up from her chair. As he watched her walk over, she seemed hesitant, almost self-conscious, and he swore she reached up to flip her hair off her shoulders, then halted the automatic gesture because there was no more hair to flip.
Your hair! Amanda, what have you done with your hair?
He didn't ask, of course. It was none of his business how she dressed or what she did or didn't do to herself. But he could understand better now why he hadn't paid any attention to this stranger who'd walked past him in the bullpen. He hadn't been expecting this at all. Hell, he hadn't even recognized her.
"Hi, Lee," Amanda greeted, her voice sounding timid. "Were you looking for me?"
"Uh, yeah," Lee stammered. He wondered what was wrong, why she was acting so uncertain around him. He couldn't keep his eyes from drifting towards her hair again and he saw her raise her hand to the back of her neck. It suddenly dawned on him how dense he was being. A woman didn't go in for this much a change in style unless she wanted people to notice. He was supposed to say something.
"Uh, you got your hair cut." Oh, that was smooth, Scarecrow, he berated himself. What happened to all that legendary charm? But somewhere along the line he'd already realized that whenever Amanda was involved all his usual rules went out the window.
"Yeah, I did." This time Amanda's hand did flutter up to touch her locks, or what was left of them. "I guess I was just in the mood for something different."
"That's certainly different," Lee agreed with a chuckle, and instantly knew he'd said the wrong thing. "Well, what I mean is... it's just... it's not what I'm used to." God, I've just made it a hundred times worse. He still hadn't told her it looked nice, which is exactly what he was supposed to say. He knew the protocol better than just about any man. He was supposed to like it no matter what. That rule applied to anything new a woman did to herself -- or bought herself. Hair styles, clothes, perfume -- it didn't matter. As a man, he was supposed to gush a bit to let her know he approved.
But he didn't like it and with Amanda the glib words wouldn't come. They almost never did, and even when he managed them, she always saw right through him. He hadn't realized before now that he didn't even bother anymore -- not with her at least. It was actually rather nice to be able to be honest with a woman and not play stupid, infantile games.
Now, however, he wished for the days when the flattering words would have sprung automatically from his lips without a thought. As he stood there stammering, trying to dislodge his oversized foot from his mouth, he saw something disappear from Amanda's eyes. He wasn't even sure what it was. He only knew he saw it go and he felt a sudden sense of loss he couldn't explain. The only thing he could think of was that he'd hurt her feelings and that bothered him.
Before he got the chance to say anything else though, Amanda changed the subject entirely.
"Did you need me?" she asked, her voice sounding as if nothing was wrong. "I still have a little bit of transcribing to do here."
Lee decided the best course would be to follow her lead. "Yeah. Billy wants to see us right away. Can this stuff wait?"
Amanda nodded. "Just let me get my things."
She walked to the computer and quickly gathered her papers together. In another moment she followed Lee out the door and into the hallway.
They walked in silence for a time. Lee kept a surreptitious eye on her, but she never glanced up at him. That bothered him more than he would have ever expected, but he wasn't sure how to breach the gap between them. He almost reached out to take her arm -- almost. As his hand moved, he brushed against his pocket. The rustle of the letter inside reminded him of yet another problem to be dealt with. He sighed inwardly at how complicated life had become. He took a deep breath and plunged ahead.
"Amanda, there's something I wanted to talk to you about."
She finally glanced over at him curiously, but didn't stop walking. "What?"
Lee realized this couldn't be done in the middle of a crowded hall. He spied a small conference room that seemed empty. This time he did take hold of Amanda's arm and steered her in that direction.
With the door closed behind them for privacy, Lee faced Amanda. She stood before him, her face showing a mixture of concern and curiosity.
"Is anything wrong?" she ventured.
Lee smiled to put her mind at ease. "No, not at all. I just wanted to talk to you about..." He paused, still unsure exactly how to put this, but as always with Amanda, the best way to proceed was with the truth. "It's not a big thing, really. I got a letter from Aunt Katie and she..."
"So did I," Amanda interrupted, her face beaming for the first time since Lee had found her in Crypto. "That's funny. She must've written to both of us at the same time. You know, she invited us to the reunion. She said she wanted to be sure I knew we were welcome there anytime. Wasn't that sweet of her?"
As Amanda prattled on as only Amanda could, Lee silently blessed his aunt. He should have known she wouldn't put him on the spot like that without giving him an out. In her wisdom Katie had provided a more than acceptable, easily explainable way for the Kings to accompany Lee to New Mexico.
He waited a few moments for Amanda to finish before he jumped in. "That's just what she was writing me about," he informed her. "She wanted to know if I knew if you planned on coming this summer." He paused. "So... are you?"
"Oh, I'd love to and I know the boys want to. Once everything calmed down last year they had a blast." She stopped suddenly and her face clouded a bit. "Of course, we'll only go if you want us to come with you. It's your family, after all."
Lee felt his stomach drop. Once more the whole issue was back in his lap. But just as suddenly he relaxed. This was still Amanda -- his friend -- and he couldn't imagine attending the reunion without her. He took her hand in his and smiled.
"Of course I want you to come."
The smile that spread on Amanda's face was radiant. After a moment, she dropped her gaze self-consciously, but not before Lee saw that whatever lived in Amanda's eyes when she looked at him had returned. He was inordinately pleased about that.
"Billy's gonna send somebody after us if we don't get going." Amanda turned and opened the door, ready to leave.
Lee followed after her, taking her by the arm as they walked together casually. Just as they neared the doors to the bullpen, Lee tightened his grip ever so slightly. Amanda glanced up expectantly.
"I really like your hair," he stated with the most sincere smile he possessed.
Amanda laughed merrily. "No you don't," she countered. "We both know it's awful." She squeezed his hand. "But thanks anyway." Her eyes danced her honest appreciation of his effort.
Lee reached over her head and pushed the door open. "What the heck, it's only hair, right? Give it a little time and it'll grow back."
Amanda passed in front of him. "Thank goodness for that."
Lee followed her over to Billy's office. Something important had just occurred, but for the life of him, he couldn't say what. Well, like Amanda's hair, all he needed was a little time to figure it out. And he would. He was sure of it.