TOO LITTLE, TOO LATE
BY
JILL HARGAN
(LOS ANGELES, JULY 1978)

The air conditioning at the Hayvenhurst Detective Agency rattled noisily then slowly shut down with a last resigned sigh. Sitting in his cubicle, Murphy Michaels pulled at the knot of his tie and echoed the exhausted ventilation system with a sigh of his own. He glanced at his watch... only 11:30. The fact that the a.c. hadn't even made it past lunch time didn't bode well for what the rest of the day would be like. He wiped at his brow, wondering why such a money-making outfit like Hayvenhurst couldn't spring for decent cooling equipment. Heaven knew they didn't spend their profits in the employees' paychecks.

"New assignments," came a voice that grated on Murphy's ears and he looked up just in time to see Donald dump a stack of bulging files onto the credenza.

"Have a heart," Murphy groaned. He was already buried with cases, but that wasn't exactly news here. "I can barely get out in the field as it is."

Donald pushed his glasses up on his nose and grimaced. "Sorry, Murph," he apologized. "Alan's orders." He took out a handkerchief and wiped the sweat off his balding head. "He's trying to even everybody's load."

I'd like to even his load, Murphy thought glumly. Alan Greavy as a co-worker had been hard enough to put up with. Now, as supervisor over their department, he'd become absolutely unbearable. The man was arrogant and condescending to the rest of the staff and it irked Murphy to have to report to him, but he kept his mouth shut and put up with it, like everyone else... joining in the dissatisfied gripe sessions during lunch and over coffee. Nobody in their section liked working under Alan... nobody except Donald here.

Murphy cast a quick glance at the stocky figure as the man moved down the aisle to descend upon Sandy's desk. Donald was the biggest brown-noser in all of Hayvenhurst and the sad part was, he actually thought Alan was his friend. In truth though, when Donald was out of the room, Alan didn't have a nice thing to say about his so-called buddy.

Murphy sighed as he listened to Sandy complain and wondered if he was ever going to get out of this zoo. Technically, he was done with his apprenticeship. He'd been here for nearly five years... two more than the state required. He knew some of his co-workers were wondering why he stayed... why he hadn't struck out on his own, or gone to work for a different agency; one where he would stand out a little bit instead of being just another cog in the corporate wheel. It was no great mystery, really. It was actually pretty funny when he thought about it, that in an office filled with private investigators, no one had figured him out yet. There was only one thing holding him here... only one reason why he stayed.

"I see good ol' Alan's struck again."

Murphy smiled at the sound of Laura's voice and he glanced up to see her standing beside his desk. Dressed in white slacks and a pale blue shirt, her brown hair pulled back into a ponytail, she had a cool look, despite the heat. Murphy could have gazed at her for hours but he always tried his best not to be too obvious.

"I thought you were off today," he stated, turning his attention back to the papers on his desk.

Laura perched on the edge of it. "I was, but there's a report I needed to finish up." She glanced at his credenza and surveyed the stack of work with distaste. "You'd think they could afford to hire a few more investigators," she observed.

"Are you kidding?" Murphy scoffed. "With seventy of us here already? And definitely not when they can get us to work like dogs." He pointed to the files. "I'm sure there're just as many waiting for you."

Laura crinkled her nose. Murphy loved it when she did that. "I guess that's what I get for taking a break," she declared.

Murphy laughed lightly. "You work harder than anybody here, Laura," he informed her matter-of-factly. "You deserve a day off once in a while."

"Thanks, Murph," Laura laughed. "I'm glad somebody thinks so."

He regarded her critically. She was far too good at her job to be stuck at Hayvenhurst. "You need to get out of here," he advised quietly. He glanced around, wondering where Donald might be lurking about.

"I told you, I had a report..."

Murphy shook his head. "That's not what I meant. Out of here... this nut house." He gestured around the room. "You're full-fledged in what? A couple of months?"

Laura grinned. "I take my test in September."

Murphy nodded. He knew that. He knew exactly when her apprenticing days would be over. "So then what? Got any plans?"

Laura's eyes darted around the office, then she gave Murphy a conspiratorial smile. "I've been checking into some things. I talked to a guy about getting a small business loan."

Murphy's eyebrows shot up. "Really? You're gonna open up your own place?" He'd thought maybe she'd start out working for someone else.

Laura held a finger to her lips to remind him to keep his voice low. "Nothing's solid yet. I'm just looking into it."

She was fired up about it, he could tell. He also knew it was something she'd dreamed about for a long time. He just hadn't counted on it quite so soon and it suddenly occurred to him that she might be gone from here in a few short months. That thought filled him with a sudden feeling of absolute emptiness and he spoke up before he could stop himself.

"Well, hey... if you need anybody to work for you..."

Laura looked at him oddly for a moment, then laughed. "Don't worry, Murph. You'll be the first person I hire. Anyway... it's still pretty iffy at the moment. I have to pass the test first."

"As if you won't breeze right through it," he said, rolling his eyes.

Laura blushed self-consciously. "Well... we'll wait and see," she hedged.

"Uh-Hemm, excuse me, please," came a strange voice.

Laura turned to see a man in a three-piece suit standing behind her. She caught Murphy's eye but he shook his head. He'd never seen the guy before.

"I'm sorry." Laura moved off the desk and out of the cubicle.

"Perfectly all right, young lady." The man smiled amiably. "I just need to borrow your boyfriend here for a moment. I'm sure he won't mind if you run out and go shopping or something."

Murphy nearly choked as he tried to stifle his laughter at the look on Laura's face. The newcomer was obviously unaware of the fire in her eyes sparked by his unthinking words. He smiled at her and Murphy was afraid the man was actually going to pat her on the head, but Laura excused herself... her jaw clenched tightly in a tremendous effort not to kick the jerk in a very painful place as she walked by.

Murphy watched her until she reached her own cube and sat down out of his line of sight. He then turned his attention to his visitor. The man sported an expensive suit but it looked out of place on him. He wore thick glasses and his hair was too curly, like he'd had it permed.

"You looking for me?" Murphy asked.

"Only if you're Murphy Michaels," he said and pointed to the nameplate on the desk. "Ah, I see you are. My name is Douglas... Ray Douglas." He held out a business card which Murphy took gingerly. "I work for Cooper and Thorpe, as you can see."

Murphy read the card. Cooper and Thorpe was apparently a law firm in the valley. He glanced back up at his visitor. "Mr. Douglas... if this is about a case, we have a legal department that handles..."

"Oh, no, Mr. Michaels. I'm afraid you misunderstand. I'm here about a personal matter."

Murphy sat up straight in his chair. "Personal? For me?" His mind flashed back over the last few months, trying to figure out if he'd run afoul of anyone who might want to sue him. Of course there wasn't anybody he could think of. He led a pretty boring life. He regarded the man curiously. "What's this all about?"

Douglas opened his briefcase and pulled out a thin file. He opened it and ran down a checklist. "You're Murphy Michaels... you have a brother, Steven?" Murphy nodded silently. "And your mother was Margaret Sandler Michaels?"

Murphy felt his hands clench into fists and his jaw tighten. "Yeah," he replied evenly. "What about it?"

The man looked up and his eyes took on an unreadable expression. "It's your mother, Mr. Michaels... I'm sorry to have to inform you that she's dead."

* * *

Laura sat at her desk and fumed. She didn't know why she even let it get to her anymore, but she did. Maybe if even one man would take her seriously... well, she was wrong there. Murphy did. He'd always been able to accept her work and her ability without being amazed at how a mere woman could do so well in a man's world. She supposed if there was one there could be others, but she'd met so few it was discouraging at times. Even her own mother thought she would do better by being a secretary or something more traditional. But then all her mother thought a woman needed a job for was to catch a husband. Laura shuddered. There wasn't anybody at Hayvenhurst she was even interested in. Oh sure, Alan Greavy was nice on the eyes... and of course, there was Murphy, but he was more like a brother than anything else... a nice, understanding big brother.

She tried to concentrate on her report, but all she could think of were different ways she might be able to trip that slug when he came by on his way out of the office. She chuckled inwardly. Now that would be a great way to show how professional she was.

She was so preoccupied in her own thoughts that the sound of rising voices startled her and she lifted her head to see where they were coming from.

"I said, get out!" someone shouted.

It was Murphy. Laura couldn't have been more surprised than to suddenly see her easy going friend stand up in his cubicle, his face red with anger and demand that his visitor leave.

"I don't want to talk to you," he continued, his voice only slightly lower.

Laura saw the other man stand up, gathering his papers in haste. "Really, Mr. Michaels," he stammered. "I only meant to..."

"Out!" Murphy demanded again.

The man took his cue and left in a rush, his face flustered as he walked rapidly down the hall.

Laura watched him go, feeling a little sorry for him, then turned back in Murphy's direction. He was still standing there, his normally pleasant face scowling darkly. As Laura watched him, wondering what on earth could have triggered such a violent outburst, Murphy himself grew aware that everyone in the office was looking at him. His eyes shifted around the room uncomfortably and then he moved... out of his cubicle and down the aisle, his long legs crossing the space in lengthy strides as he headed for the door. The only person who tried to stop him was Donald.

"Really, Murphy," the shorter man began indignantly. "If you think you can make a scene like that and..."

Murphy shoved past him unceremoniously. Donald stood there with his mouth hanging open.

"Back to work, people. The show's over."

Alan's authoritative tones sounded smoothly over the room. Laura saw him standing outside his office, waiting to see that everyone did as he asked. One by one, everyone sat down and went back to work. Donald hurried over to Alan and Laura was certain he would be full of stories about Murphy's abrupt departure. She hesitated only a moment. Without a backwards glance, she hurried out the door and followed after Murphy.

The heat of the day hit her like a blast as she trotted out to the parking lot. She could see him far ahead of her. He'd already reached his car and was climbing inside. She quickened her pace.

"Murphy!" she called, hoping he would hear her and wait. "Murph!"

She saw him glance up and knew he'd seen her. For a moment he looked like he was going to wait for her, but he must have changed his mind for he suddenly pulled his door shut and gunned the engine. With a squeal of his tires, he raced his car out of the lot and disappeared down the street. Laura stood looking after him, torn between leaving him alone and following him. In the end, her respect for his privacy won out... mostly because he was already too far ahead of her and she would never have caught him.

* * *

When Laura came into work the next day, the first thing she did was look for Murphy. His cubicle was empty... the file he'd been working on yesterday still spread out across the desk. She stood there for a moment, wondering again what could possibly have caused him to bolt like he did, then she noticed the business card lying crumpled by the telephone. Impulsively, she reached out and picked it up.

"Good morning, Laura."

She turned, startled by Alan's presence behind her. He too seemed to be perplexed by Murphy's empty work station.

"Morning, Alan," she replied and discreetly pocketed the card.

"I don't suppose you've talked to Murphy?" he asked quietly. Laura shook her head and Alan's eyes narrowed, not really out of concern but more in annoyance. "I need the Flanders case closed ASAP," he stated evenly, then turned to give her a hard gaze. "If you see him, tell him to get his butt..." Alan paused and gave Laura an apologetic smile that she didn't buy. "Sorry, Laura. If you hear from him, please tell him I need to see him at once."

She watched him walk away. What a superficial twit he was. She glanced around Murphy's desk one more time, then returned to her own. She sat down and pulled out the business card, smoothing out the wrinkles. Cooper and Thorpe, she read. Attorneys at Law. Then the name underneath it... Ray Douglas, paralegal.

She sat and thought for a time, pondering what she should do. She really had no right to intrude into Murphy's personal life, but she was worried about him. It was so unlike the man she knew to create a scene like yesterday and run off without saying a word... and then to not show up for work without even a phone call... She shook her head. Something was definitely wrong.

Impulsively she picked up the phone and punched in the numbers before she could have second thoughts.

* * *

Lee Stetson reached out from the sheets and fumbled for the telephone, wondering what time it was. That was the bad thing about foreign assignments. They always screwed up his inner clock for at least a week when he got back home.

"H'llo," he mumbled groggily, not even bothering to open his eyes.

"Lee? Is that you?"

"Yeah," he said hoarsely. "Who's this?"

"It's Steven."

Lee's eyes opened wide at that and he was instantly awake. "Steven?" he repeated incredulously. He hadn't spoken more than a few casual words to his cousin in... geeze, he thought... he couldn't really remember a time when he and Steven had ever just sat down and talked. When they were young boys, Steven had been such a bully, it had been hard to even be in the same room with him. Then, as they got older, Steven had gone off to college and gotten married. Even though they were related, Lee didn't have much in common with his older cousin. He didn't even know Steven had his number.

"Well... yeah... Steven..." he stammered, not sure how to even proceed. "How ya doing?" He knew he probably sounded like an idiot.

"Not so great, Lee," was the answer and now that Lee was fully awake he could detect the strained quality in the voice on the other end of the line. "I was kind of wondering if you'd heard from Murphy."

"No... well, not in a few weeks." Lee sat up and ran a hand through his hair. It had actually been over a month since he talked to Murphy and he felt a stab of guilt at that. It was, after all, his own fault that they weren't keeping in as close touch as in the past. "Why? Is anything wrong?" There was a pause on the other end and Lee's imagination soared into overdrive. "He's okay, isn't he?" he inquired anxiously.

"He's fine as far as I know," Steven assured him hastily. "It just that... well we've had some news and I don't think Murphy's probably taking it very well."

Lee breathed out a sigh of relief then his brow furled. "What news?" Obviously Steven wasn't handling it all that well either or he'd have just come out with it already.

"It's our mom, Lee. She passed away last week."

Lee suddenly got a new insight into the term speechless. He couldn't think of anything that had come more out of the blue and he could well imagine Murphy's reaction. After a few moments, he managed to collect himself.

"How? I mean... who told you?"

"Some guy from a law firm," Steven answered. "He stopped by my school. Said he'd already seen Murphy and he'd thrown him out of the office." Steven paused again and then gave a short, dry laugh. "I can believe that. Anyway, I tried to call Murph but couldn't get anyone. I even drove up there yesterday, but..."

"He wasn't there," Lee finished.

"Least he didn't answer the door." Steven sighed audibly.

"Does your dad know?" Lee asked quietly.

"Not yet. I wanted to talk to Murphy first... see if he wanted to be there when I told him... guess I should've known better."

Lee could hear the bitterness in his cousin's voice. Neither brother had ever come to terms with each other over this part of their lives. It was still a source of much contention between them.

"I thought maybe you might know where he'd go... Maybe if you found him, he could talk to you."

"No problem, Steven," Lee assured him. "I'll be there as soon as I can catch a flight."

"Thanks, Lee," his cousin told him gratefully. "You got my number?"

"I don't think so," Lee admitted embarrassedly. "Let me write it down." He scrambled for a pencil and jotted down the number. "I'll be in touch."

He hung up the phone and fell back onto the bed, breathing out loudly. He was still pretty beat. He knew he wouldn't really recover from his jet lag for some time but he couldn't wait for that to happen. He sat up and swung his legs over the edge of his bed, reaching for the book on the nightstand. Flipping through it, he found the number of his travel agent. He heaved another sigh and picked up the phone again.

* * *

Laura sat in her car, parked across the street from Murphy's apartment, and checked her watch yet again. Over two sweltering hours and still no sign of her friend. She knew he wasn't home. When he hadn't come into work again today, she'd called repeatedly with no answer each time. Finally she'd left the office on the pretext of going out in the field. She'd decided to try and track Murphy down. There had been no one home when she got here and his car was not in its assigned parking space. Having no idea where he might be, she'd settled down to wait. He had to come home some time and when he did, she was going to demand explanations... like where he got off worrying her so much.

She'd gotten nowhere with the law firm on the card. The only thing they kept telling her was that they couldn't give out that kind of information. She sighed and cursed the stupidity of legal red tape. The only thing it did was waste everyone's time. She continued staring out the window, wondering again where her friend might be.

She noticed a shiny new Porsche pull up and park in front of the complex. After a moment, a tall, nice looking man got out and walked up to Murphy's door. Laura sat up a little straighter, trying to get a better look. This newcomer was dressed in jeans, and a sport jacket... and with his shades might have walked right out of GQ. She watched with interest as he stood at Murphy's door and rang the bell several times. Laura wondered who he might be and how he was connected to her friend.

Her mild curiosity quickly changed to concern. When the man got no response, as Laura knew he wouldn't, she saw him cast a quick glance around, then bend over the door knob. Her mouth grew tight as she realized what he was doing. He was obviously proficient at picking locks for in an instant he had the

door open and slipped inside Murphy's apartment.

Laura didn't waste time wondering what to do. Outraged that someone had broken into Murphy's home, and deeper down worried what that might indicate about her friend's current absence, she got out of her car and dashed across the street. Whoever this guy was, he was going to answer some questions.

She slowed as she reached the door, pausing at the entrance to get her bearings. She listened for a moment and could hear the faint sound of someone walking around. Slowly she peered around the door, hoping she couldn't be seen.

The man had his back to her as he stood by the serving bar that opened up into Murphy's kitchen. He looked like he was flipping through some kind of address book and Laura could hear him muttering to himself. As she watched, he tossed the book aside and heaved his shoulders in obvious frustration. Deciding she better take some action, she stepped all the way inside.

"Can I ask what you're doing here?" she demanded authoritatively.

The man whirled, his hand moving faster than Laura thought possible as he reached under his jacket and somehow produced a small handgun. Laura froze where she was, her mouth gone dry. This was not something she had expected and the sight of the pistol pointed at her head was more than a little unnerving. Somehow though, she managed to gather her wits enough to find her voice.

"Are you going to shoot me?" She marveled at how calm her voice sounded to her own ears.

The stranger studied her curiously then he gave her a slight smile. "That depends," he informed her evenly.

"On what?"

His face grew serious again. "On who you are and what you're doing here."

Laura managed her own tightly controlled smile. "Funny," she said, "I was going to ask you the same question."

The man continued to stare at her for a few moments. He was good looking, but there was also something dangerous about him, Laura decided... more than just the gun he was holding on her. She swallowed hard, wondering what she might have walked in to, but the stranger suddenly lowered his weapon and stuck it back into his shoulder harness, where it was covered up by his jacket.

"You're Laura, aren't you?" The smile on his face appeared more genuine now and the threat was gone from his eyes.

Laura raised her eyebrows. How did this guy know her name? "I'm afraid you have me at a disadvantage," she informed him coolly.

"Murphy's told me all about you," he continued, then looked apologetic. "Hey, I'm sorry. My name's Lee... Lee Stetson." He held out his hand. "I'm Murphy's cousin."

Laura's mind raced through all the names Murphy had ever mentioned to her in connection with his family. She knew he had quite a number of cousins and she seemed to recall the name "Lee" coming up more than a few times. It was just possible the man in front of her was telling the truth. Reluctantly she took a step forward and reached out to shake his hand.

"It's nice to finally meet you," he said then his face grew serious. "I wish it were under better circumstances."

Laura immediately felt a stab of dread at his words. "What's happened to Murphy?" she demanded.

Lee shook his head and shrugged. "That's what I came here to find out. The family hasn't heard from him in a couple of days. His brother called me and asked if I could come out and try to find him."

"Why would he pull a disappearing act?" Laura wondered out loud. "That's not like Murph."

Lee glanced over at her, his eyes narrowed. "He didn't tell you?"

Laura shook her head. "All I know is some paralegal showed up at the office. Whatever it was he had to say really upset Murph... he started yelling and tossed the guy out. Then Murphy walked out too and hasn't been back since. I'm starting to get pretty worried about him."

She saw a mixture of emotions cross Lee's face and she could tell he was trying to decide something. Finally he sighed and ran a hand over his face. For the first time, Laura noticed how tired he looked and she wondered just how far he'd had to come to get here.

"I don't know where he took off too," Lee stated slowly, "but I can tell you what set him off." He glanced up at her again, his blue eyes still uneasy. "His mother died. That's what the lawyer came to tell him."

"His mother?" Laura echoed in surprise. "But I thought..."

"Yeah," Lee finished for her. "You're right. Murph hadn't seen her since she split. I guess that's been about... about sixteen or seventeen years now."

There was silence between them for a moment. Laura felt a mixture of different feelings. She was relieved first of all that Murphy wasn't in any physical danger... yet she knew enough about him to know that the subject of his mother had always been a difficult one for him to talk about. It was one thing they had in common... they'd both been abandoned by one of their parents, albeit Murphy had been much younger than Laura was when her father left and losing your mother was probably more traumatic for a young child to deal with.

"Well," she said finally, "wherever he is, he can't be far. He's been home. The mail and the paper are both inside."

Lee nodded absently, as if he'd noted those facts as well and Laura couldn't help wondering what it was he did for a living. Her eyes strayed curiously to where his gun was concealed. Even though she and Murphy were private investigators, they didn't carry weapons... Hayvenhurst frowned on their apprentices running around armed and Laura liked to think a good P.I. didn't really need one anyway.

"I'm afraid I don't know the area that well," Lee was saying. "Is there someplace he might go to be alone... to just think?"

Laura thought furiously... trying to recall any place he might have mentioned or that they'd gone together on one of their days off. "He likes to hike in the mountains," she remembered. "I've gone with him a few times, but I don't know any one particular place... wait a minute!" She smiled suddenly as the memory came back to her.

"You got something?" Lee demanded.

"I think so," Laura told him. "Come on, I'll show you."

* * *

Lee took a deep breath of the salty air as he rode silently beside Laura in her small convertible. He'd taken off his jacket during the ride through the Valley and he could definitely feel the difference in temperature since they'd hit Pacific Coast Highway. He glanced over at the woman behind the wheel. The wind whipped her long brown hair but she ignored it, her face gazing ahead determinedly. Lee studied her surreptitiously. Murphy had talked enough about her that Lee knew his cousin was crazy about her. He also knew Murphy hadn't done anything about those feelings yet and he wondered if Laura had any idea what she meant to her co-worker.

Probably not, Lee decided. Knowing Murph, it would take him forever to even think about making a move. Lee sighed inwardly. It was the one thing about his cousin he couldn't understand. As far as Lee was concerned, life was too short to waste a lot of time wondering if a woman was interested. Either she was or she wasn't... and if she wasn't, you moved on.

The car had picked up speed and Lee noticed that the summertime traffic had thinned out considerably. He glanced down at his watch. It was nearly two o'clock. Laura hadn't said where they were going and he wondered just how much further they were going to drive. He was just about to ask, but he didn't have to. He saw a sign for Pepperdine University just as Laura pulled over by a set of tennis courts and parked her car.

"You think he's playing tennis?" Lee asked skeptically as they got out. He saw Laura gazing around the lot..

She shook her head. "No." She pointed to a older sedan. "There's his car," she announced triumphantly. "Come on."

To Lee's surprise, she didn't head over towards the vehicle. Instead she trotted back over to PCH, waiting at the signal to cross the street. He followed her and in a few minutes they were on the cliffside of the highway, looking down onto the beach below them. The small stretch of sand was nearly deserted.

"There's lots of these little secluded coves," Laura commented. "If you're brave enough to make the climb, you've got the beach to yourself." She started walking again and Lee trailed after her. "Murphy showed me one place he said he and Skip had found when they were in high school," she continued as she stopped again to search the sand below. "He said he still liked to go there sometimes to just get away from everything."

"You don't remember how far it was?" Lee asked, peering over the edge as well. None of these cliffs looked tremendously inviting to climb.

"Not exactly," Laura admitted, "but it can't be too far." She moved a little further up the path and then suddenly stopped. "There!" she exclaimed. "This is it... look." She pointed down at the shore.

Lee came up beside her. The inlet was indeed small... only a dozen or so feet of sand. There was only one solitary figure there and it was hard to tell at this distance but Lee was suddenly sure it was Murphy.

"How do I get down?" he asked.

Laura had pushed her sunglasses up on the top of her head and was squinting down at the person on the beach. She turned to Lee and gave him a wry smile. "Very carefully," she told him.

Lee rolled his eyes. "Thanks." He looked at her questioningly. "You coming?"

Laura shook her head. "This is a family thing," she said quietly. "He'll probably be more comfortable with just you."

Lee nodded then took an appraising look at the cliff. It was about a fifty foot climb, but he could see nearly invisible hand and foot holds dug into the side. Maybe it wouldn't be as hard as he thought. He took a deep breath and started.

For about the next fifteen or twenty minutes, all Lee was concerned with was finding the crumbling niches and hanging on for dear life. He distantly wondered how Murphy had made it in one piece and he didn't even want to think about how they were going to climb back up. Finally though, he found himself down on the sand and he paused a moment to catch his breath and let his heart slow from its racing pace. He took a step back and glanced up to where he'd just come from. He could see Laura standing up there waving at him and he raised his hand to let her know he was all right. Then he turned toward the beach.

* * *

Time was a vague thing for Murphy. He really couldn't remember if it had been two days or three since that jerk had shown up at the office. All he knew was that here at the beach he didn't have to think about anything. He could sit and watch the surf pound the shore, its rhythm mesmerizing him for hours. If he got too hot, he could take a dip and cool off... coming back to let the sun dry him. It was easy to lose himself here and that was just what he wanted to do, though he knew he couldn't stay here forever.

Somewhere in the corner of his mind were the nagging voices of responsibility. One tried to tell him he needed to show up at work soon or risk losing his job. Another kept reminding him he wasn't a kid anymore and he couldn't really hide from the unpleasant things in life. But that voice was weak and easy to ignore.

"Nice place," another voice commented and Murphy sat up straight in surprise. He turned around and squinted up at the figure of his cousin standing behind him. "A little too quiet for my tastes though," Lee continued conversationally, as if it were the most ordinary thing in the world for him to be here.

Murphy could think of a hundred different responses, the main one being what in the hell are you doing here, but he refrained from asking stupid questions. Lee was here and that was all that mattered at the moment. Murphy gave his cousin a wry smile.

"I was looking for quiet. Didn't really feel like company."

Lee moved over and sat on the blanket beside Murphy. "You want me to go?" he asked evenly.

Murphy shook his head. "No." He turned his gaze out toward the ocean. The surf was calm here, the breakers only a foot or so high. Overhead he could hear the cry of the gulls. He glanced back over at Lee. "Thanks for coming."

Lee shrugged. "No problem, Cuz."

There was silence between them for quite some time. Murphy sat and listened to the pounding surf. He knew Lee wouldn't push. He would wait until Murphy was ready to talk. The only problem was that Murphy didn't really want to talk... not about that anyway.

"How'd you find me?" he finally asked.

Lee smiled and jerked his thumb over his shoulder and up at the cliff above them. "That's one smart lady you work with."

"Laura?" Murphy raised his eyebrows and turned to scan the edge of the cliff. He could see her distantly, sitting up there waiting. He turned back to Lee. "You tracked her down?"

Lee shook his head. "Didn't have to. We sort of ran into each other at your place. She was pretty worried about you and had been trying to find you herself."

Damn, Murphy swore to himself. The last thing he'd wanted was for Laura to think he was a basket case. He heaved a sigh and got up to saunter out to the shore. Lee followed beside him. Murphy reached down to pick up a broken shell and toyed with it absently.

"You know what the hardest part of this whole thing is?" he spoke after a time. "Finding out how close she's been the whole time," he finished. "I mean, ever since I was a kid I always thought that maybe she'd been hurt or was sick or something... that she never came back 'cause she'd been hit by a bus the night she left and had amnesia." He gave a rueful laugh. "I know that sounds dumb, but that's what I told myself... that's why she never called or never sent birthday cards or never came to see me." Suddenly angry, he threw the shell far into the water. "Shows you how much kids know, huh?"

He felt Lee's hand on his shoulder. He glanced over at his cousin. This would be awkward for Lee, Murphy knew. Never at ease with his own emotions, Lee had always had trouble dealing with the turmoil of others. But Murphy also knew that Lee would try to be comforting... that nothing could have kept him away. Though they lived far apart, there was still that bond between them that drew them together when either of them was in trouble.

"So what do you wanna do, Murph?" Lee asked quietly.

Murphy shrugged. He hadn't really thought about doing anything. "The lawyer guy... he told me where my mom's place was in Santa Barbara." He glanced over at Lee. "You feel like taking a drive?"

Lee nodded. "Sounds great." He turned toward the cliff and grimaced. "I sure hope it's easier going up."

Murphy followed his gaze, took in the sheer rock wall, and then dropped his mouth in astonishment. "You came down that way?" he asked with a laugh.

"Well, yeah... it was the only way... wasn't it?"

Murphy laughed again at the look on his cousin's face. "Well, it's one way. I always use the path over there myself." He pointed up the shoreline and saw Lee's eyes follow his direction until they too saw the trail down the slope and filled with chagrin at his mistake. Murphy slapped his cousin on the back good-naturedly. "Don't feel too bad," he consoled, still chuckling. "I guess it's not really that visible from up top."

Lee's mouth twisted. "Come on," he groused. "I should've known you'd be the one to find a trail, Bloodhound."

Murphy smiled broadly as he picked up his blanket and then joined Lee. Together they trudged through the sand and up the steep path. It was a long hike, but Murphy knew it had to be easier than scrambling down the way Lee had. He smiled inwardly. He hadn't bothered to tell Lee that the first time he and Skip had found the small cove, they'd also taken the more treacherous route, mostly because Skip was so eager to get here, he hadn't wanted to waste time looking for another way.

They were nearing the top now and Murphy's smile faded. He knew Laura would be up here and he wondered what she must be thinking about him. He hadn't meant to worry anyone, least of all Laura, but he had to admit he hadn't thought about anything really besides getting away from everything and everybody. He could see her standing there a few feet from him as he approached with Lee. Her hair was blowing in the salty ocean breeze and her face looked concerned, but she managed to give him a warm smile. The sight of it lifted his spirits enough that he was able to return it with one of his own. Laura closed the distance between them, coming over to take his hand.

"You had me pretty worried," she told him, but her voice was without reproach.

"Sorry," he murmured. "I wasn't thinking very straight." He inclined his head in Lee's direction. "Thanks for taking care him."

Laura smiled again. "I didn't do all that much," she insisted. "He would've found you eventually." Her expressive brown eyes grew more serious. "What do you want me to tell Alan?"

Murphy shrugged uncomfortably. "I don't know... I guess technically I'm entitled to some time off." He shrugged again. "Tell him I'll be back in on Monday."

Laura nodded. "I'll do that... and don't worry. Take all the time you need." She glanced across the street at the parking lot. "I guess you guys don't need me so I'll take off." She reached up to give Murphy a quick peck on the cheek. "Take it easy, Murph." She turned to Lee and he reached out to shake her hand.

"Thanks, Laura." He flashed a charming smile that for some reason struck a chord of jealousy in Murphy.

She turned to go and they stood and watched her as she trotted across the highway and was soon lost from sight. Murphy breathed out slowly.

"She's pretty terrific," Lee stated. "I can see why she's got you hooked."

Murphy chuckled wryly. "Nobody's hooked," he informed his cousin. "But you're right... she is terrific."

"Well, Cuz," Lee began after a few moments, "where to?"

"Santa Barbara," Murphy instructed. "That's where Mom lived for about the last ten years."

"Okay," Lee agreed pleasantly. "We're in your wheels. You wanna drive or you want me to?"

"I'll drive," Murphy informed him, shaking his head. "The last thing I need is for you to get pulled over for speeding in my car."

"Me?" Lee's face took on a look of innocence. "I'll have you know I haven't been pulled over in a long time. Besides," he grinned, "I don't think that buggy of yours is capable of speeding."

"Very funny." Murphy jabbed his cousin with his elbow. Side by side they walked in easy silence as they made their way across the street and over to Murphy's car.

* * *

The drive to Santa Barbara was peaceful and beautiful. Lee sat back in the passenger's seat of Murphy's practical Olds, listening to the tape of vintage Beatles tunes. He'd never been along this stretch of PCH before and was appreciating the view. It was a shame the circumstances of this trip kept it from being completely enjoyable. He glanced over at his cousin. Murphy was intent on the road, his face expressionless. His eyes were hidden behind his sunglasses or else Lee might've been able to tell what his cousin was feeling. Not that he didn't know anyway, but Lee suspected Murphy was actually more shaken up by the fact that his mother had always been in such close proximity, rather than by her actual death. Lee knew that in all the ways that mattered, Margo Michaels had been dead to her sons for a long time.

Even without traffic, it took a couple of hours of steady driving and by the time they finally reached the resort town, the sun was dipping down toward the ocean and a cool breeze was in the air. They made a brief stop at a small office where Murphy picked up a key from an agent, then they continued on to a row of small, beach-front homes. Murphy pulled up and parked beside an older, but neatly-kept, wood-frame house. He made no move to get out of the car.

Lee stayed put, waiting for his cousin to make the first move. This was Murphy's call. If he decided he didn't want to go in, then Lee wouldn't argue. He took the time to study the place, from its colorful flower gardens to it's freshly painted exterior. His aunt either spent a lot of time keeping up her home or else had a damn good caretaker and gardener.

"The lawyer says she bought this place back in '68," Murphy spoke up suddenly. "I guess she thought we'd be too old by then to want to come visit her here at the beach."

Lee heard the accusation there loud and clear but there wasn't much he could say to counter it. As far as he was concerned, Murphy had every right to be angry.

"You wanna go in?" he asked quietly.

Murphy sat there, one hand on the steering wheel, the other toying with the house key. As Lee watched, he took off his sunglasses, tossed them onto the dash and leaned back against the seat. He sighed and shrugged his shoulders.

"I can't," he whispered, almost to himself. "I thought I could, but..." He shook his head in dismay.

Lee reached over and placed a hand on Murphy's shoulder. "Don't worry about it," he consoled him, hoping he could be comforting. "Maybe now's just too soon."

Murphy glanced over at him, his eyes unsure. "You don't think I'm just being a jerk?" He gave a nervous laugh.

Lee shook his head and smiled. "No way, man. I don't know what I'd do in your situation. Maybe some other time you can go in... take a look around."

"Or maybe not," Murphy stated softly.

"Maybe not," Lee agreed evenly. "But you don't have to prove anything to anybody, Murph. Just do what feels right to you."

Murphy was silent for several minutes, then he turned to Lee. "You know what I feel like doing?"

"No, what?"

"I feel like having a beer. Whaddya say?"

Lee laughed and slapped his cousin's shoulder. "That sounds great."

Murphy broke into laughter as well and abruptly backed the car out of the driveway. In a short time, they'd left the house far behind and were headed into the main part of town.

* * *

Murphy woke up in his own bed, wondering how he'd gotten there. His head felt like a rock on the pillow and when he tried to lift it, a wave of nauseating pain washed over him and he flopped back down with a groan. He vaguely remembered sitting in the bar with Lee most of the night, knowing he was drinking too much but not really caring. He cared now.

"Hey, Murph." Lee's voice rang loudly in his sensitive ears. "You're gonna be late if you don't get up."

"Late?" he mumbled into the pillow. "Late for what?"

"That meeting you told me about," Lee reminded him. "The one with the lawyers."

Murphy groaned again and pulled the pillow over the top of his head. He felt the bed move and knew Lee had come over to sit down beside him. With a great deal of effort he rolled over to glare at his cousin.

"Why'd you let me drink so much?" he complained grumpily.

Lee shrugged casually. "You seemed to need it," he answered simply. "Besides, I didn't think you wanted a babysitter."

Murphy heaved a great sigh and pulled himself up to a sitting position. The room spun for a moment, then settled down.

"You still plan on going to the meeting?" Lee inquired.

Murphy grimaced. "I guess so. If I can keep my head from falling off."

Lee laughed kindly and held out a bottle of aspirin. "Try a few of these," he offered. He got up and walked over to the bedroom door. "I've got some coffee ready when you are," were his parting words.

Murphy watched him go, then sighed again. He slowly managed to get to his feet and stumble over to the bathroom. He knew he'd feel much better after a shower.

He was right. After a long, hot shower, four aspirin, and about three cups of Lee's strongly brewed coffee, Murphy felt more like a human being. Hopefully now he would be able to get through the rest of this day.

"You sure you want me to come?" Lee had been keeping him company at the table. "I mean, this might be just for family, you know?"

Murphy scowled. "You are family," he insisted.

"You know what I mean," Lee stated.

"Yeah I do," Murphy answered determinedly. "But I also know that I'll never be able to sit there with Steven and my dad and listen to all this stuff about Mom without some moral support." He pointed at Lee. "That's you, Cuz."

"If you say so," Lee agreed reluctantly.

"I do," Murphy replied, then added, "and thanks."

* * *

Lee stood with Murphy outside the small conference room, waiting for his cousin to gather up enough courage to walk through the door. Murphy hadn't said much the entire trip over here and now Lee wondered if perhaps his cousin might back down and just turn around and walk out. From the look on his face, it seemed the thought was going through his mind. Lee laid a reassuring hand on Murphy's shoulder.

"You okay?" he asked quietly.

Murphy drew in a shaky breath. "I don't know, man. I don't know if I can do this."

Lee wished he knew the right words to say... a way to give Murphy the support he needed, but this was definitely not his strong suit. He settled for squeezing the shoulder under his hand, as if he could communicate through mere touch what he wanted to say. He saw Murphy close his eyes and a tear slipped from under his lashes to roll down his cheek. It was obvious to Lee that his cousin's emotional control was tenuous at best.

"You do what you need to do," Lee offered softly. "You don't have to go in if you don't want to."

But Murphy had opened his eyes and was nodding slowly. "Yes I do," he whispered. "I do have to."

Without another word, Murphy reached out to open the door. Lee followed his cousin into the small, somber room. Everyone else was already there waiting and all heads turned as they came in. Lee saw the undisguised joy in his uncle's face at the sight of his youngest son. It was obvious the man hadn't expected Murphy to show up. Steven sat across the table, his wife Karen sitting beside him, holding his hand. The look on Steven's face was entirely different than his father's. Lee decided that his older cousin was angry with his brother for holding them up so long. Lee sighed, knowing Murphy and Steven were always at odds about their parents.

The lawyer motioned them to their seats and began to read through his folder of legal documents. As he sorted through all the details about property and assets and dispersal, Lee kept an anxious eye on Murphy, but his cousin's face was expressionless. Lee knew all too well what that meant. Murphy had battled with his emotions and had once more decided to wall everything up. It probably wasn't a very healthy way to deal with life but Lee supposed he wasn't exactly the one to make that judgement. God knew how many things in his own life he'd chosen not to face.

The meeting lasted a little more than an hour and by the time they were done and back outside, Lee felt like he'd been cooped up all day. He took a deep breath of the hot summer air and glanced over at Murphy walking beside him. His cousin had stayed close, choosing not to hang around and visit with the rest of the family. Lee could see Uncle Robert and Steven standing off by their car.

"You sure you don't want to go over and talk to them?" Lee asked.

Murphy shook his head and gave a small laugh. "I can't handle that on a good day."

"Whatever you say." Lee glanced down at his watch. "I gotta catch my plane in a couple of hours. Should we head out to the airport?"

"Good idea," Murphy agreed readily, all too eager to get away. "You need to turn your rental in?"

"Yeah, why don't we go back and pick it up and I'll follow you."

It took them about an hour to do that and then they stopped to grab some lunch. Before Lee even realized how much time had passed they were standing in the terminal waiting for the boarding call for his plane. This was the part about seeing his family that Lee always hated... saying goodbye.

"Well, Cuz," he began hesitantly, "I guess I'll be seeing you around."

Murphy chuckled at that. "I won't hold my breath," he said, then looked contrite. "Hey, I'm sorry. That was a cheap shot."

Lee shook his head. "No it wasn't. You were right. I'm lousy about keeping in touch."

Murphy smiled. "Well, you were here when it counted. Thanks for that."

Lee shrugged. "Any time, Murph. I mean that."

Murphy reached out his hand and took Lee's in a firm grasp. "I know you do, Lee." He pulled Lee into a quick embrace and when he broke away Lee could see the tears welling in his cousins' eyes... tears Murphy wouldn't shed in front of him and Lee knew they'd come a long way from when they were children.

Lee shook Murphy's hand and made a quick exit for both their sakes.

* * *

Laura sat at her desk, trying hard not to appear obvious as she watched Alan's office. Murphy was still in there and she wondered just how hard things were going to come down on her friend's head. Everything seemed quiet enough. There'd been no outbursts or ranting or wild arm waving. Hopefully the two men could get this settled like adults.

Even as she thought it, the door opened and Murphy walked out and ambled over to his cubicle. Laura waited what she considered a discreet amount of time before she made her way over to the next row of desks. As she came in, Murphy glanced up at her, a confused expression on his face.

"Well?" Laura asked. "How'd it go?"

Murphy's brow furled. "Fine... I guess. He chewed my ears a little for leaving without saying anything, but then he went into this song and dance about time off for bereavement and how much he felt for my lose."

"Well, that was awfully human of him," Laura quipped with a smile. "He must've been in a good mood."

"He was." Murphy's face grew even more confused. "I thought I was a goner for sure about that Flanders case, but all he did was tell me what a great job I'd done and how much he respected my dedication to go ahead and work in such a difficult time." Murphy looked up and shook his head. "I didn't know what he was talking about."

Laura merely smiled and shrugged her shoulders. "Maybe you had more done on it than you remembered," she suggested helpfully.

Murphy shook his head again then laughed. "Maybe."

Laura's smile grew wider, glad he'd accepted that thin reasoning. She decided to change the subject before he put two and two together. The last thing she wanted was for him to feel like he owed her anything.

"So, is your cousin still in town?"

"No. He caught a plane back to D.C. yesterday." He glanced up and smiled warmly. "Thanks again for all your help."

Laura waved it aside. "I didn't do anything but save him a little time."

Murphy's smile never dimmed but he nodded. "Okay... if you say so."

"How're you doing?" Laura asked on a more serious note.

Murphy was quiet for a moment but then he nodded again. "I'll be all right," he stated firmly. "It was just so out of the blue."

"I know what you mean," Laura agreed. "It'd be the same for me if my dad happened to walk through the door."

Murphy reached out to squeeze her hand and Laura wondered at the pressure of his grasp. It seemed so intense for just a moment and then suddenly he let go as Donald came thundering down the aisle and stopped outside the cube.

"New assignments," he announced, dumping a stack onto Murphy's credenza. It seemed to Laura that the man took special glee in doing it and she rolled her eyes as he waddled away.

"We've got to get out of here," she declared in a fierce whisper.

Murphy laughed. "Amen to that," he agreed whole-heartedly. "You know, I'm counting on you to be the one to do it."

Laura chuckled, but deep down, knew he was telling the truth. For some reason he was waiting for her to make a professional move. She smiled to herself, her resolve growing even stronger to break out of this menagerie and make a name for herself. She glanced back over at Murphy. She would be sure when she did, that there would always be a place for him working right there beside her.