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On May 9, 1994 Jacob Thomas Michaels, Sr. passed away. Later that month a few of the more distant Michaels cousins gathered at the Holiday Inn in Lansing, Michigan to celebrate his passing. A wake was held in his honor and we hope he would be happy to know that a good time was had by all. I would personally like to thank everyone who came and participated in the festivities. I had no idea so many people would show up and was only sorry that there wasn't time to get to know everyone. Maybe we'll do it again next year. Let's see... 1995 is the year Buddy meets the family. I guess we'll all have to wear hats.
Here are the eulogies we received at the party. They were all great. Not everyone put their name on their entry
so to be fair I left all the names off. I hope you enjoy them as much as we did.
For such a poor excuse for a man,
Uncle Jake sure was a great excuse for a party.
There was a cousin named Jake
Whose attitude no one could take.
But happy to say
He croaked off today
And that's why we're having this wake.
As we are here to mark the passing of Jake,
We must remember that events such as this (especially this)
Reaffirm the presence of God.
If there were no God,
Then the old buzzard would have outlasted us all.
Jake's life was something of a wonder.
His every act was a social blunder.
No act was too dastard
He really was a bastard.
Thank God now he's six feet under!
Uncle Jake - - How shall I begin?
Uncle Jake was a man. A man who married.
Rode frequently in the West.
And now we're here to celebrate his big bounce off the saddle.
May he rest in peace.
They say time passes,
And so, most regrettably, does Uncle Jake.
As we gather to mourn his passing,
May we remember... what is it we're to remember?
I think I'll have another drink.
It's so hard to find the words to say at a time like this.
So I'll just make it short and sweet.
Bye Uncle Jake.
Bring on the chocolate!
The news it is so sad
About poor Uncle Jake.
It really is too bad
He had to miss his wake.
My own dearly departed mother, Eleanor Jean Wallace,
(May she rest in peace)
Raised us on the adage
"If you can't say something nice,
Don't say anything at all..."
. . . Next?
We gather together to celebrate - er- commemorate the passing of Uncle Jake.
We are very glad he was here.
Without him, we wouldn't have had Scott or Nicky or Buddy,
Or a place to hold these reunions.
We are glad he was here.
Okay, now let's party!
Jake was a fine man.
I know that everyone loved him deeply.
He got along with everyone.
He gave his life defending our country.
He... what?
This isn't for Jake, Jr.?
Never mind!
When you eulogize someone you're supposed to say the best about them.
So I'd like to say that Jake has made a lot of people VERY happy today.
Poor Uncle Jake.
He's as dead as the pinata we bashed at his wake.
Yet we will remember him fondly,
And relive our visits with him again and again... and again... and--
WAIT A MINUTE!
The doctor isn't a cousin,
but maybe we could contact him--
Hmm?
Oh. He is a relative?
The blond one with the cricket bat?
Well, looks like the cousins have just gone intergalactic!