MICHAELS BY MOONLIGHT
BY
ROBIN CLOWARD
(SANTA MONICA, SOMEWHERE NEAR THE PIER,
SUMMER, LATER THAT SAME DAY, 1993)

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Randi Wallace fidgeted in her chair, checked her watch and glanced at the deepening twilight outside the window. Ian Matheson noticed her squirming and looked in her direction. She raised her eyebrows in an unspoken question. He shrugged helplessly and turned back to their guests.

"As I was saying," Edmund Blackadder continued, his tone implying severe displeasure at Ian's momentary inattention. "I had to sell the place."

"It was haunted," Baldrick supplied helpfully.

"Alleged to be haunted," Blackadder corrected. "I myself have never seen a ghost there."

"What about the time you tripped over Lady Catherine's head?" Baldrick interjected.

"I'm going to trip over your head in a moment."

Randi jumped to her feet. "Ian, I really need to get something in the bedroom."

Ian got up and followed her. "Excuse us a moment, Cousin Edmund, Mr. Baldrick." He walked into the bedroom, shutting the door behind him. "Couldn't you have come up with a better excuse than that?"

"Ian, in fifteen minutes, I wouldn't need an excuse. I'd just rip them to shreds." She gestured toward the living room. "Can't you rid of them? They've been here too long already. How am I going to get to the bookcase? Walk in, say excuse me I'm about to become a wolf, don't mind while I lock myself up?"

"I don't want to be rude."

Randi closed her eyes and grit her teeth as a contraction shuddered through her body. When she opened her eyes again, they flashed yellow before subsiding back to brown.

"Don't worry, I have something in here." Ian sprang to the closet and dragged out a large shoe box. Inside were several sets of handcuffs, a pair of leg irons and a muzzle. "Just in case of emergencies."

Randi studied the restraints skeptically. "Do you think that's enough?" She nodded toward the window. "What if I get out?"

"Not to worry. We'll move the dresser in front of it. Maybe if you don't see it, you won't remember it's there."

"I'd rather throw Cousin Blackadder out the door." Randi grimaced with the pain as another tremor passed.

"Here." Ian took her wrist and fastened on one side of a pair of handcuffs. "I will use all three of these on your arms, then use the leg irons to attach you to the toilet in the bathroom. There aren't any windows in there. Then I will put the muzzle on you, lock the bathroom door, move the dresser, lock the bedroom door and lock myself in the bookcase." He smiled hopefully. Randi shook her head.

"There isn't time," Ian argued, leading her to the bathroom. Randi's snarl told him he was right. He worked quickly, securing her as best he could, locking the bathroom door and shoving the bed in front of it for good measure, jockeying the huge dresser to a spot in front of the window and securely fastening the bedroom door after him.

As he walked back into the living room, a blood chilling howl rose up from the room behind him. Blackadder sat upright in his seat, his eyes widening in terror. Baldrick glanced around uneasily.

Ian grinned broadly and dropped back into his chair. "P.M.S."

* * *

The soft, gentle light of the full moon illuminated the long line of beach houses on the seaward side of Pacific Coast Highway. Many were lofts with garages below and living quarters above

supported by pylons pounded into the sand. Closer to the pier, a park overlooked the shimmering expanse of beach below.

Jonathan MacKenzie sighed and leaned against the cold metal railing at the edge of the pier. "We've lost him. It's hard to hide on a night like this."

"Not for a vampire," Edgar Benedek replied. "They eat this stuff up. He could be standing next to you."

"You're the only one standing next to me," Jonathan said, but he glanced back over his shoulder just in case. People, in pairs and small groups, were strolling along the pier, enjoying the warm night, but none of them looked suspicious. Fishermen lined the railing on the far side. Hardly anything to worry about.

"Hey, John Boy, look at that!" Benny pointed down toward the beach. In the distance was a massive hairy animal with a peculiar almost apelike gait moving at high speed.

"It's just a dog."

"That's no dog I've ever seen. Look at those arms, look at that muzzle." He leaned over the edge for a better look. Jonathan grabbed the back of his Hawaiian shirt.

"You're going to fall off."

"That's a werewolf!"

"Werewolf?" Jonathan repeated, far from convinced. He took a second look at the creature bounding in their direction. On closer inspection, he found it didn't look much like any dog he'd ever seen either.

"And me without my silver bullets," Benny said, patting down his shirt.

A young man leaning against the railing opposite them raised his head. "Werewolf?" he said softly to himself. He stared off across the pier to the beach beyond. "Randi." He checked on the positions of MacKenzie and Benedek, then quickly hoisted himself up and over the side. He landed on a cross support, then dropped the rest of the way down to the sand and rocks.

The werewolf galloped toward him, loping into the shadow of the pier and lunging for him with a savage growl. She was fast but he was faster. With one deft move, he tackled her and wrestled her to the ground. Her teeth clicked as his right hand forced her mouth closed. He wrapped his arms around the struggling werewolf and half dragged, half carried her behind one of the pylons.

"Careful, Johnny, it has to be down here somewhere."

A flashlight beam played across the sand. Randi struggled, freeing a furry hand to reach out and claw the air beyond the safety of the piling. Her rescuer quickly snatched it back out of sight.

"Are you sure this is such a good idea?" Jonathan asked. I mean, if this is a werewolf, wouldn't we be better off not meeting it on the underside of a pier?"

"But if we don't catch it tonight, we'll never find it tomorrow. Werewolves don't stay werewolves in the daytime."

"I know that." He hesitated, obviously struggling with what he wanted to say. "But we aren't looking for a werewolf. We came here looking for a vampire."

"We need a bigger flashlight. I think I've got one in the car. You wait here. I'll go get it." Benny started back toward the stairs.

"Wait a minute, I'm not staying down here alone."

"I thought you didn't believe in werewolves?"

"I don't," Jonathan replied and hurried after him.

Randi writhed and clawed, trying to break free. The young man pinned her against the sturdy wooden piling and snatched up a large piece of driftwood. "Sorry, Sis," he whispered and broke it over her head. The wolf slumped to the sand. He picked her up carefully, slung her over his shoulder and started back the way she had come.

* * *

Benny bounded back under the pier with Jonathan following unenthusiastically in his wake. "This is better." He played the large flashlight beam up along the underside, just in case something was planning on pouncing on them. "Looks safe."

Jonathan directed his beam down at the sand. "Look at this." He kneeled beside a disturbed patch of sand and picked up a broken piece of driftwood. A tuft of gray fur clung to one of the rough edges.

"Aha!"

"Aha? Maybe it's from a dog playing catch."

Benny plucked the fur loose and rubbed it between his fingers consideringly. "No, this is definitely werewolf fur." He scanned the immediate area with his light. "See, a wolf's footprints come in from that direction, there's a struggle and a man's footprints go off in that direction." He held the light under his chin, illuminating his face from below. "Obviously a transformation took place." He began making faces in a reenactment of the event.

"I thought werewolves could only change back when the moon set?"

Benny shrugged and pulled the beam away from his face. "Then the vampire met the werewolf, beat him up and carried him away." He pointed the flashlight down the beach. "That way."

"Do you know how ridiculous that sounds?"

"Look, John John, this guy we're looking for was found frozen in a snowbank in Alaska, USC pays to send him south, somehow he gets defrosted and then he gets up and walks out."

"He was defrosted because you left the freezer door open."

"Is the idea of a defrosted man coming back to life any stranger than a vampire running off with a werewolf? I mean talk about cryogenic suspension. Walt Disney, eat your heart out!"

"Walt Disney was cremated."

"That's what they'd like you to think." Benny started down the beach.

"Where are you going?"

"After them. You don't think Dr. Moorhouse is going to pay for this little jaunt if we come back empty-handed, do you?"

"Why do I even bother?" Jonathan grumbled, falling in behind him.

* * *

The young man steadied Randi's limp body with his left hand, freeing up his right to knock twice before grabbing hold of her again.

Ian's smile of welcome quickly faded into an expression of deep concern. He reached out his hand to stroke Randi's soft damp fur.

"I'm Russell Michaels. You must be Ian." Russell freed up his hand again and shook with him but Ian couldn't spare him more than a glance.

Ian ran his fingers through the thick fur behind Randi's ears, then trailed them down her long pointed muzzle, pausing to feel for breath at her open mouth.

"She's fine but she's heavy. Do you have anywhere I can put her down?"

Ian glanced anxiously toward the living room but the glass brick partitions that divided the entryway from the living room were effectively blocking his previous company's vision. "This way." He led the way to the bedroom, pulled the key from his pocket and unlocked the door. It swung open to reveal a tremendous mess. The dresser was clawed beyond recognition, the window was shattered and the bathroom door was totally missing. He gestured toward the remains of the bed. "Please feel free to unburden yourself."

"Interesting decor."

"Randi's idea. You know, early American werewolf."

Russell carefully dropped Randi's unconscious body on the tattered mattress. The remaining leg on the bed shuddered and collapsed, dropping the box springs to the floor. Russell laughed. Ian stared into his mouth.

"My, what sharp fangs you have." He gestured back and forth from Russell to Randi. "You and Randi aren't both, I mean, considering you're twins and all, perhaps the curse traveled between you and..." He paused, then shook his head. "No, of course you aren't. You'd be furry too. It's just that your incisors..."

Russell sighed and ran a hand through his reddish hair. "I'm a vampire."

"Vampire?"

He nodded. "Alaskan snow vampire."

"I didn't know they came in different varieties."

Russell laughed. "Neither did I but..." He shrugged. "I was out ice fishing. I got bitten by a seal. Didn't think anything of it at first but suddenly I was different. I could turn into things."

"Bats, smoke?"

"No, lemmings and seals." He shrugged again. "And in the summer when it's light all the time, I hibernate and when it's winter and dark all the time, I'm up twenty-four hours a day."

"Really?" Ian looked at him carefully. "But surely, it's summer now, time for you to be hibernating."

"That's my problem. Somebody found me. I'm not even sure how I got down here. I woke up in someone's freezer. Of course, as soon as I found out I was in California, I knew I could look up Randi, but I may have caused her some trouble."

"It's no bother. We have a large freezer."

"No, I mean, there are two guys chasing me. I was having some fun with them, leading them around town, I didn't even think about the moon."

"They saw Randi?"

Russell nodded. "They're not very good but they're persistent." He pointed toward the open window. "I think I'd better go back and distract them."

"I appreciate you bringing Randi home." Ian reached down and scratched her gently behind the ears. Her eyes suddenly flew open and a soft growl rumbled in her throat. "Uh oh." He quickly jerked his hand away as Randi made a grab for it. Russell caught hold of her muzzle and gathered her back into his arms.

"Where have you got to?" Blackadder asked, irritation twisting his rodentlike face. He frowned into the bedroom, taking a general inventory of the devastation. "What's going on? What's become of Randi?"

"She had to run out for some Pamprin," Ian replied quickly. "You know, that time of the month."

"Who's this?"

"This is..."

"A neighbor," Russell interrupted. "I was hoping Ian and Randi could take care of my dog for a few days."

"I don't want that ugly thing around while I'm staying here."

Randi growled and struggled against Russell's hold.

"We haven't yet established that you're staying here at all, Cousin," Ian said. "Now if you'd please just go back into the living room."

Randi pulled her nose free and let out an echoing howl. On the beach outside, Benny stopped short and looked back over his shoulder.

"Did you hear that?"

"It came from that house there. The one with the broken window."

"This is it, John Boy. We've got them cornered." He patted Jonathan on the shoulder. "You wait down here. I'll go up and flush them out."

"But what am I supposed to do when they show up?"

"Improvise." Benny began climbing rocks to reach street level.

"Easy for you to say," Jonathan sighed. He leaned back against one of the house's pylons and waited.

* * *

Baldrick looked up at the sound of a knock on the door. He glanced left and right, establishing that he was indeed the only one left in the living room, then he got up to answer it.

"Good evening, Sir," Benny said.

"Evening."

"I'm here to walk the dog."

"What dog?"

Randi howled again.

"That dog."

"If you've come to walk the dog, how come you haven't got a leash?"

"Clients have to provide their own leashes."

"It doesn't seem fair. I mean, how much money do you suppose a dog has anyway?"

Benny peered over Baldrick's shoulder. "Is there anyone else I could talk to?"

Baldrick pointed down the hall. "His lordship's down there."

"Thanks." Benny stepped inside, walked quietly to the bedroom door and peeked inside. Two men he didn't recognize were arguing just inside the doorway but a little ways beyond stood a very familiar person clutching a frantically thrashing werewolf.

Benny jumped into the room. "Time for walkies."

Russell looked up, startled at the sound of Benny's voice. His grip on Randi loosened just long enough for her to break free and dash for the open window. "No, wait!" He made a grab for her but she launched herself into the air and disappeared into the night.

Jonathan turned at the sound of something large thudding into the sand beside him. Randi rose to her feet, slitted yellow eyes glowing in the darkness. She snarled, her upper lip rippling over her long sharp fangs. Jonathan swallowed hard. He didn't dare break eye contact with her. She could probably outrun him and there was nothing to climb.

A wave broke behind him. Cold, foamy water flowed up the beach and over his shoes. He wondered if werewolves could swim.

* * *

"Hold it right there, Buddy," Benny yelled, pointing a finger at Russell. "You've got a few questions to answer."

Russell climbed up onto the window sill. "Maybe later." He waved and jumped out, landing not far behind Randi. She spun around at the sound. "Easy, Sis," he said softly. He could see Jonathan standing a few steps away, his face paler than the moon.

Randi hesitated, trying to choose between them.

"Don't move," Russell whispered.

"I can't," Jonathan replied.

Suddenly Randi's head snapped up and she turned south, sniffing in great lungfuls of air. Without a second glance at either one of them, she loped off down the beach.

"Where's she going?" Jonathan whispered.

"Back to the pier," Russell replied, running off after her.

Jonathan collapsed against a pylon and slid slowly down into the sand. He was startled back to his feet by the touch of a hand on his shoulder.

"Come on, Johnny, the game's afoot," Benny shouted.

"How'd you get down here so fast?"

"Adrenaline, now come on. Which way did they go?"

Jonathan pointed. "Toward the pier."

* * *

Ian hurried over to the window, stumbling over the remains of the dresser in his haste. He stared down at the beach, hoping to catch a glimpse of Russell or Randi but all he could see was a moonlit expanse of sand.

"This place has so many bizarre goings on that it almost makes me homesick for Lady Catherine. If only the bank hadn't foreclosed...I mean, closed the sale so soon, I would leave immediately," Blackadder grumbled.

Ian turned angrily. "I've had enough of you, Cousin Edmund. You're the cause of all this trouble."

"All what trouble? A lost dog?"

"Get out."

"I've been thrown out of better places than this."

"You've been thrown out of every place but this," Baldrick corrected.

Blackadder grabbed him by the shirt. "Come along."

"You needn't write," Ian called after them. He followed them to the door just to make sure they were really leaving, then grabbed his jacket and hurried outside himself.

* * *

Randi cut across the parking lot and loped up the walkway to the pier taking the stairs two at a time. Russell was right on her heels, shoving people aside as he went. She shot straight across the boardwalk and broke through a window into the carousel building. People ran screaming in every direction.

* * *

Nick Knight leaned against the metal siding of the hot dog stand, arms folded across his chest, waiting patiently for his partner to finish eating. He gazed over at the big full moon hanging in the west, already starting down. The nights seemed to be getting shorter and shorter. He sighed and ran a hand through his thick, black hair.

Schanke finished doctoring up his meal and walked over to stand beside him. "In all the times we've stopped for dinner, I've never seen you eat a thing. Why is that?" He bit into his chili dog, spilling pickle relish and onions down the front of his shirt.

"Because watching you eat makes me lose my appetite," Nick replied, smiling and turning away.

Schanke wiped at his shirt with one hand. "We should come here more often. Nice summer night. People just hanging out. Sure beats downtown."

"Yeah." Nick looked toward the eastern end of the pier and frowned.

"What's up?"

"I'm not sure. It looks like a crowd is forming."

"Probably a mime. I hate those things." He took another bite of his hot dog, this time dribbling chili.

"Maybe," Nick replied, but he kept watching just in case.

* * *

Randi raced onto the carousel, dazzled and confused by the lights and movement. A carousel horse came down beside her, striking her with its hoof. She sank her teeth into its wooden leg and was lifted off her feet as it rose back into the air. The leg splintered between her jaws. She dropped back to the floor only to be clipped by a second horse.

"Randi!" Russell jumped onto the carousel, dodging horses and screaming riders.

The calliope music started up again, blaring out from the center of the ride. Randi panicked, trying to escape from the noise, leaping blindly away from its source. The movement of the ride and her own momentum threw her into the side of the ticket booth. She crumpled into a wet heap of fur.

"There he is!" Benny yelled, motioning in case Jonathan couldn't hear him above the noise.

Russell sailed off the carousel, scooped up Randi's limp body and ran off into the crowd. People were shouting and running all around him and he took advantage of the confusion, leaving Jonathan and Benny far behind him.

* * *

Schanke watched as Russell ran by. "You know, Nick, I think you're right. Something is definitely going on." He turned to say more and found he was alone. "Hey, wait up." He stuffed the rest of the hot dog in his mouth, looked around for a napkin, gave up, wiped his hands on his shirt and took off in pursuit of his partner.

* * *

"He can't go much further," Benny gasped. "That's the end of the pier up there."

"I can't go much further," Jonathan replied. "No matter where the end of the pier is."

Up ahead, Russell saw the safety railing and beyond that the dark expanse of the sea. He got a better hold on Randi, then aimed for an open spot between two fishermen.

"Excuse me," he shouted, hurdling over the top rail and plunging into the black waters below.

* * *

"He jumped," Benny said incredulously, sliding to a stop at the exact spot where Russell had gone over the railing. He shone his flashlight onto the water. People crowded around to see but there was nothing to look at except the choppy surface of the ocean. "I didn't know vampires could swim."

"It doesn't look like they can," Jonathan replied.

"One side, please, police." Nick worked his way to the front of the onlookers, flashing his badge at those reluctant to let him past. He walked up beside Benny. "Suicide?"

"Suicide? No way. A dead guy can't kill himself."

"Dead guy?"

"Vampire."

Nick nodded slightly. "I see." He looked back as Schanke plowed up beside him.

"So what's up?"

"Suicidal vampire."

"What?"

"Call for help. Victim in the water."

Benny leaned further over the rail. "Wait, there's something moving down there." He turned the light onto a dark object bobbing on the surface.

Nick shook his head. "Congratulations. You've discovered a seal. Now we're going to need statements from everyone who saw what happened." He pointed to Benny and Jonathan. "I'll need to take you two in for questioning."

"He didn't mean what he said about vampires," Jonathan said.

"Look, we can't come right now. We have to go down and check."

"The Harbor Patrol will do that for you. Come on." Nick herded them away from the edge.

* * *

The loud chop of helicopter blades caught Ian's attention and he looked toward the pier. Something big was going on. He could see searchlights and several boats. Fear squeezed his stomach into a little ball. He took off running.

* * *

"I can't wait until the moon sets," Russell said through clenched teeth as he shoved his twin sister's watersodden body up onto one of the cross-supports beneath the pier. "I'm getting tired of hauling you around." He made sure she was secure, then settled himself down beside her, watching helicopters with floodlights and men in scuba gear probe the water for their missing bodies. He was happy to find that his pursuers were not among them. Inept though they were, at least they knew what they were looking for.

A chopper skimmed low, its blades beating the ocean surface into a frenzy of ripples. The high powered beam of its searchlights played around the sand far below him. It came up to the base of the pilings, then moved on, blocked by the pier itself from searching any farther.

"What's going on?" Randi mumbled, her now hairless body sprawled exactly as her wolf self had been.

"Hang on a sec," Russell replied, quickly unbuttoning his wet shirt and handing it to her. "Here. Put this on."

Randi made a face. "It's wet."

"And you're naked. Put it on."

Randi glanced down. "Well, in that case." She shivered as she slipped into the wet material. "Ouch."

"What's the matter?"

"Splinters." She slipped the tail of the shirt under her bare backside.

The copter swooped low again, vibrating the pier with its noise.

"What are they looking for?"

"Us."

"I didn't kill anyone, did I?"

"No."

"Good." The helicopter moved to a quieter distance. "Ian will be worried sick. Maybe you could turn into a bat and go for help."

"I don't do bats. I'm a snow vampire. I do seals and lemmings."

"Lemmings," she repeated softly. "Hmmm. Take off your pants."

"What?"

"I have an idea."

* * *

All the disaster seekers were crowded at the end of the pier hoping to see a body pulled from the dark water. Ian stepped up beside one of them.

"Excuse me, could you tell me what's going on here?"

"Some big crazy dog chased a guy off the end of the pier."

"Oh."

"They both ended up in the water," someone else volunteered.

"Oh," Ian repeated again, feeling lost and helpless and wishing he had never heard of his cousin Edmund Blackadder.

"What's a nice guy like you doing on a pier like this?"

Ian turned quickly and saw Randi working her way toward him. She was wearing wet clothing that was obviously not her size and a smile fuller than the moon. He raced forward to give her a powerful hug and a kiss, and was dismayed when she pulled back from him.

"What's wrong?"

"I've got Russell in my pocket."

"What?" He stared incredulously as a little reddish brown lemming poked its head out of her pocket. "I guess he won't be needing the guest bedroom then."

"It's the perfect disguise. Everybody is looking for a man with a wolf not a girl with a lemming." She laughed and grabbed his hand. "Come on, I've got to get him in the freezer before sunrise."

"Of course," Ian murmured.

"I'll explain on the walk back." She shivered.

"You'll catch your death in those wet clothes." Ian took off his jacket and gallantly draped it across her shoulders. "Though I must say you do look stunning in a wet shirt."

Randi cupped her hand over Russell's head. "Ian, not in front of my brother."

"We'll take him home, make him a little bed in the ice cube tray and then we can discuss this in more detail."

Randi's eyes twinkled. "I'd love to."

Ian smiled. "Come along then." He put his arm around her protectively and they started for home.